I am a leaping swordsman,
A real swashbuckling champion:
I slice the air with majestic flair,
Oh, you should have been there.
Sergeant McGrigor cut a dashing figure,
But I settled him with a thrust and a snigger;
With a pout and a grin, a slash and a spin,
I made him jump right out of his skin;
Oh, you should have seen me, man!
I took on all-comers, and passed their muster,
Each one of all five a fencing instructor;
Receiving no cuts, as I cut the mustard,
To leave them feeling both flummoxed and flustered;
You really should have been there, man!
I'm a verbal fencer, a sabre dancer,
More deadly than any Polish lancer:
I'll foil the aim of any chancer;
To my rapier wit, there's just no answer.
I am the leaping swordsman,
A real swashbuckling champion:
I slice the air with majestic flair,
Oh, you should have been there!
When I bested the best,
And reduced all the rest;
Oh, you should have been there!
You should have been there.
I am a leaping swordsman,
Just like a leaping salmon:
I grace the air with majestic flair;
Oh, you should have been there!
The grenadier called for a running leap,
But my standing leap became a flying leap;
For no hole is too deep, no gradient too steep,
No gap too wide for these legs to sweep;
Oh, you should have seen me man!
Three times he ran and three times he jumped,
But my standing jump really had him stumped;
Until the challenge he'd made ended in farce,
As the third time he ended up flat on his arse;
You really should have been there, man!
I'm a spring-heel jack, a jumping jack flash,
A jack-in-the-box, a jack of all blades.
Like Jack I'm nimble, like Jack I'm quick;
My leap is long, as my gait is slick.
I am the leaping swordsman,
Just like a leaping salmon:
I grace the air with a majestic flair;
Oh, you should have been there!
When I rose to the test,
And soared and impressed;
Oh, you should have been there!
You should have been there.
(Lyrics & Music: Gary Miller)
© 2017 Whippet Records
Copyright Control MCPS/PRS